Herman Griffin Obituary

Herman Griffin
August 23, 2024
The day we went to pick up Herman Griffin's remains we were distressed that we didn't know what to do with Dad's ashes, our parents left directions for basically everything which needed our attention except what to do with their remains. As we were pulling out of the funeral home parking lot and into the turn lane to enter the freeway, we glanced at the car next to us and there it was, our answer from the great beyond and it came so quickly, a bumper sticker that said HONOR GRIFFIN. Well, we thought, you just don't get any louder messages in life than that one so this is our love letter to you, Pop.
Herm was a man's man. He liked doing "guy things" like watching sports, hunting, playing poker, drinking booze, buying new cars every couple of years, keeping the garage clean, and pretending that he could fix something. Anything.
Herm provided well for the family. He was a '60s husband and father - he did what was expected of him for the times and he conformed in the way that most people did back then. If he had dreams of becoming something other than what he was, we never heard about it.
He was a man of few words. Dad loved us and we (mostly) knew it. He rarely told us and when he did, it was in his much later years. He loved us the best way that he knew how and our happiness was paramount. He was tough on us as kids but looking back, we now know he wasn't trying to be our friend, he was trying to be our father. As we got older, his soft spots showed though at times. When he walked us down the aisle to get married, he had sparkly tears in his eyes, and he said, "It's not too late to change your mind you know, we can still run out the back door if you want!" Both of us are still married to the same men. Herm adored our mother, Nancy. We think that he was amazed that he was lucky enough to have landed her she was absolutely stunning with a smile and a laugh that made him go weak at the knees; it was that kind of lucky love.
Dad gave us great morals, a strong work ethic and expressed the importance of making your own way in the world. He told us, "Don't depend on anyone else for your financial support, be self-sufficient." He expected us to behave ourselves and not embarrass the family, meaning him. Dad had an interesting relationship with most people - if he liked you, he liked you (almost) all of the time, unless you crossed him and then he'd hold a grudge FOREVER and you were never in his good graces again. He would not be mad at us for writing that truth. He had humble roots but was proud of his personal and financial achievements. He was a smart saver and investor, which he taught to his daughters. "Live within your means" was his credo. Growing up, the only credit card that we recall seeing our folks use was the Sears "charge a plate" up until about 1974. Herm rarely gave anything out of the goodness of his heart. Thankfully our mother did, as she supported so many causes and was an avid volunteer for various organizations. Dad saved everything he earned to leave to our mother and us. Naturally, he assumed that he'd "go first" so imagine how miffed he was when she passed before him.
He had a quiet respect for the natural world. As a responsible hunter and fisherman, he did not believe in killing simply for the sport; if an animal was going to sacrifice their life, then the meat should be eaten and not wasted. He had a great respect for the power and the danger of firearms so he taught us how to target shoot. We came to understand that with that power comes responsibility. More than anything it instilled a lifelong fear and respect for firearms.
Dad believed in God, mainly on major holidays. He loved watching TV: golf, baseball, basketball, football, highball. Notice there is a recurring theme here where balls were always involved. For years he had a Barcalounger in the family room where you could find him with a highball in one hand and the channel changer in the other. He never listened to any of the family conversations until the two-minute commercial break, so if he wanted you to fill him in on what he missed, you had better make it quick!
Herm served in the National Guard in the late '50s and was paired up with a guy named Loyd Bonfante. For reasons unfathomable to both their wives, the two were given the keys to the kitchen and spent most of their tenure in the Guard horsing around during KP duty. Neither was renowned for their cooking skills, but they did remain lifelong friends, each competing to outdo the other for the bad behavior many hangovers later, Loyd was the acknowledged winner. Sadly, he is the last man standing out of the foursome of friends. Dad had a successful career with Safeway. He managed stores in Santa Rosa, Healdsburg, Sonoma, and Sebastopol. Corporate headquarters tried to lure him away a few times, but he would never hear of leaving his beloved Sonoma County. Growing up in the little town of Santa Rosa, going to junior high and high school were some of the best years of our dad's life. He met our mother at SRHS where he was one of the "Kings on Campus" and she was one of the "Queens." He remained lifelong friends with so many people from those days and stayed in touch until he could no longer remember many of them due to advancing dementia.
Herm was born in Seminole, Oklahoma in January 1936 and passed in August 2024 due to complications related to Parkinson's disease. Preceded in death by Nancy Weeks Griffin. He leaves behind his daughters Ganeen Griffin Vega (Hector Vega) and Colleen Griffin Wilson (Mark Wilson), two grandchildren and six great-grandchildren, sister-in-law Sally Weeks Gard, and numerous nieces and nephews. Per his wishes, no services are planned.